From wedding parties at Shooters to connections forged through the Duke Marriage Pact, love is a Duke tradition — just ask the over 6,000 couples who have tied the knot at Duke Chapel.
In time for Valentine’s Day, The Chronicle caught up with a few of these lovebirds to reminisce about their Blue Devil beginnings.
Finding forever on the first day
Jamie Claar, Trinity ‘96 and Fuqua ‘04, and Robyn Claar, Trinity ‘96, didn’t waste time finding love on campus, meeting on the very first day of their first year. Both living in Pegram Residence Hall, they initially connected over a dinner organized as part of the first-year programming and made their relationship official by October.
“When I started at Duke, it wasn't like, ‘Oh, I'm looking to meet my wife’ on the first day,” Jamie said. “… We just met and really got along well, and so we enjoyed spending time together. It just evolved pretty easily, in my mind, to dating.”
Jamie, who grew up in Cleveland, was drawn to Robyn, who went to high school in south Florida, because she didn’t “remind [him] of any of the girls that [he] knew from home.”
Although the couple moved away from Durham after their graduation, their hearts stayed close to the place where it all began. The Claars chose to get married at the Washington Duke Inn & Golf Club, just a short drive from West Campus.
“Durham has always had this magical place in our lives, so it actually felt very natural to come back and get married here,” Jamie said.
The ceremony was officiated by Professor of Political Science Peter Feaver, Jamie’s favorite teacher.
In 2012, the Claars moved back to Durham. After reflecting on the countless memories and happiness the city had brought them while living in different places for graduate school and other professional obligations, they knew it was time to come home for good.
“This [was] the first time that we [had] complete freedom to make a choice based on what we [wanted], and so we literally just decided that we wanted to be in North Carolina. So we both quit our jobs and moved down,” Jamie said. “[We] took a big leap of faith, but it’s worked out.”
A match made at Green Room
Anne Choate, Trinity ‘95, and David Choate, Pratt ‘94, first crossed paths at The Green Room, an off-campus gaming hall, during Anne’s sophomore year.
The meeting almost didn’t happen — Anne’s friend, playing matchmaker, had to drag a tired and reluctant Anne out for the night. But her friend’s persistence paid off.
“She's like, ‘look, I won’t be your friend unless you come. You have to come out tonight,’” Anne recounted.
Anne might not have been thrilled about the outing at first, but David quickly began to change her mind. She was impressed by his charm, recalling that he was “a gentleman.” After attending a party together a few weeks later, David officially asked Anne on their first date.
Not long after they got together, Anne and David made the long drive down to Myrtle Beach for the iconic annual end-of-finals celebration and became closer along the way.
“We got that drive … to get to know each other better,” Anne said. She explained how they came from different backgrounds and were studying different subjects, but their shared interest in the environment “started to bring [them] together.”
When David graduated from Duke the following year, Anne gifted him a scrapbook filled with photos and notes, capturing all the memories they had shared as students.
“I gave it to him kind of thinking this could be the end, but at least he'd have all these memories,” she said. “It was very sad, but it was also actually a good launching point for ‘maybe we want to see if we can make this work.’”
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So the couple decided to continue their relationship long-distance throughout Anne’s senior year, visiting each other once a month. After they each finished school, they “made a deal that [they’d] go wherever the person got the first job.” Anne ended up winning the bet, securing a job in Washington, D.C. After living there together and dating for a few more years, the Choates tied the knot in 1998.
A locked door and lifelong love
Kelly Muir, School of Medicine ‘01, and Andrew Muir, School of Medicine ‘93 and Graduate School ‘01, first connected thanks to a locked door and perfect timing. Kelly, a senior in the medical program, and Andrew, a house staff member at Duke University Hospital, struck up a conversation while locked outside a lecture he was set to give.
Not long after Kelly’s graduation, fate brought the Muirs together again, leading to a coffee date that evolved into a summer romance. Come fall, though, distance tested their budding relationship as Kelly began her residency in her hometown of Charlotte while Andrew stayed at Duke.
“I was so busy that year, I don't think I would have had time to spend much time with anyone,” she said. “So it was probably a good way for our first year to be, because we'd really just met.”
After a year apart, Kelly moved back to Durham to complete her residency at Duke University Hospital. By that point, she had “pretty much figured out that this was the guy for me.” Andrew proposed the following year.
Kelly now works as an ophthalmologist at the Duke Eye Center, while Andrew practices as a gastroenterologist at the Duke Gastroenterology Clinic. Both hold professorships in their respective fields at the School of Medicine.
“It’s hard for partners to find jobs that they are both still really rewarded and satisfied and that are in the same place,” Kelly shared. “… To both be working for the same university and both be really happy in our jobs has been great. It's really the only place either one of us have ever worked once we finished our medical training.”
While building careers at Duke Medical Center, the Muirs have remained deeply connected to the University where they met.
“All three of our daughters were born in Duke Hospital,” Kelly said. “… I feel like our lives are so intertwined with Duke and Durham at this point, it's almost hard to separate out.”
Decades of love and Duke pride
Virginia Lang, School of Nursing ‘67, first crossed paths with her husband, Stephen Lang, in 1966 when he was interning in Duke Hospital's surgical department.
At the time, Virginia was entering her final year in the nursing program. She recalled strolling down a hospital hallway when she saw Stephen for the first time, who looked like he was “drowning” in an environment where he was “completely out of his element.” For Virginia, it was love at first sight.
“I said, ‘Ooh, he's really cute. Oh, and he looks like he really needs somebody to be his best buddy. I think I will do that,’” she said.
Virginia recounted that she knew immediately that Stephen was the one for her, commenting to her friend, “I think I'm going to marry him.”
The Langs took their time before saying “I do,” though. They waited four years, choosing to focus on building their careers and growing as individuals before starting their life together.
“It takes time to build a relationship, and you have to know what qualities you like and people you want to hang out with,” Virginia said. “I think the Nursing School was very good at teaching us what qualities we wanted to develop in ourselves and how those qualities mesh with other people … He had all the qualities that I liked in a human being: kindness, thoughtfulness, worried about his patients more than himself and [knowing] how to work as a team.”
After tying the knot, the Langs put down roots in Durham, where they’ve stayed for over 50 years. Together, they’ve watched Duke evolve — cheering through countless sports games, seeing new presidents take the helm and even sending two of their children off college there.
“We've watched Duke develop from a small regional hospital into this mega industrial complex,” Virginia said. “It’s been instrumental in developing us as human beings.”
Editor’s note: The Muirs are the parents of first-year Sarah Muir, a staff writer for The Chronicle’s 120th volume.
Sarah Diaz is a Trinity first-year and a staff reporter for the news department.