Sandbox

Things got a little crazy (rowdy? wild? kinky?) at Christmas this year. A little psycho-sexual, you might say.

I probably just made you uncomfortable right now, because I bet you think of Christmas as all about family togetherness with plenty of peace/love/joy themes. But you ought not to feel too bad for me. I swear my family is just as weird as yours. We just wanted to see Black Swan as much as you secretly did.

I celebrate Christmas a little differently from everyone else in America, and what I mean by that is that I never legitimately celebrate it. But that isn’t to say that I don’t celebrate at all. Holidays should never be wasted. Jews just like to do all the things you aren’t doing, like eating culturally diverse takeout selection. It’s both economical and our tradition.

As per every year, mom and I were bored with nothing to decorate, trim or glaze and no worthy television programming. We called a Loews and debated seeing The King’s Speech or Black Swan, but obviously we both wanted to see the latter.

Later that night we drove to the theater and joined the large queue of other non-believers, once for tickets and again for a feast of popcorn, candy and soda. The film was so-so. The audience was entertaining. Packed to capacity, the theater brought out the holiday with moments of horror, pleasure and, most of all, family-togetherness.

You may think your Christmas-time is special, sacred even. But if you see me on campus, ask me how my holidays were and you’ll realize that your family is not really special at all. I’m special.

Belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Years to you all.