Zombieland

Take Transformers, dial down the Michael Bay, sub in zombies, strip out the main plot, sprinkle in a faux Michael Cera, throw in a redneck and you’ve got a worthy approximation of Zombieland.  Though it sounds like a hilarious concoction, the film industry’s latest zombie B-movie is destined for oblivion.

In a post-apocalyptic America, where a hamburger-transmitted virus turns most of humanity into zombies, the lanky, awkward Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) meets redneck Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) and embarks upon a half-witted journey to find Twinkies, casually slaying zombies along the way. After being robbed by sister con artists Wichita (Emma Stone) and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin), the two groups eventually join together on a trip to a supposedly zombie-free Los Angeles amusement park.

The film detracts from the overcrowded zombie subgenre, utilizing masses of the undead as video game-type ploys to keep the action or humor moving. First-time director Ruben Fleischer fails to recognize the audience’s instinct to laugh at his unthreatening zombies, inadvertently making them more humorous than believable. The convenient romance that blossoms between Columbus and Wichita is similarly implausible, leaving the film’s buddy movie aspect its only convincing dynamic.  Near the film’s close, Columbus remarks that he’s found the family he never had. But even this elicits a chuckle instead of a tug on the heartstrings.

Zombieland was an enjoyable ride, but no mass of zombies can save the trite and tenuous plot. You’ll leave the theater with a few good laughs and an otherwise empty mind.