One of the benefits of writing a blog is that you get to address issues you wouldn’t normally be able to in print. The fact is, it’s the Internet, most anything goes. So with this post I decided to engage in a debate on the merits of the (in)famous site known as Fmylife.com.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with the site, Fmylife.com is sort of like JuicyCampus or PostSecret in that people submit short, anonymous messages. The posts are about extremely bad /embarrassing events that happened to the person, all of which end with the phrase ‘FML’ (short for F My Life). For instance, one example of a typical post is: Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't hang out with me because he felt really sick. I went to his house anyway to surprise him with homemade soup. I walk in to his room only to find him hooking up with my sister. She can't drive, our mom drove her there. FML.
The site has become all the rage for youngsters these days, to the point where saying “FML” is basically synonymous with “Wow, my life totally sucks.” So I invited some (fictitious) experts to the blog to discuss the topic of Fmylife.com. With us today we have world-renowned FML expert, Dr. Rusty Bumper, as well as a woman we randomly plopped off the street with promises of a job interview and free Subway, mother of 3, Negative Nancy.
Interviewer: Let’s get some opening statements from you two, Dr. Bumper, let’s start with you…
Dr. Bumper: Thanks. First off, I’d just like to start I love your blog. Your piece on single, 50 year old, sad, lonely men who still with their parents and enjoy creepily reading sites intended for teenagers really hit home with, uhhm, a friend of mine. But moving on to FML, I just want to say it’s a great site. It’s just flat out hilarious. Whenever you need a pick me up, it’s the perfect “pity” site to make you realize “at least I don’t have it that bad!”
Nancy: I’d first like to say I have no idea what I’m doing here. I was told this was a job interview and there would be free sandwiches. But what the hay, I’ll go with it. As a mother of two beautiful children and one other one that’s actually kind of weird looking, I decided to look at this FML to see what my kids were talking about. Let me just say I’m outraged. As an overprotective parent, I'm obligated to point out that it’s extremely vulgar. But what really grinds my gears is that it’s ridiculous how unbelievable they all are! I mean, should I really believe that some kid’s parents walked in on her while she was in bed with her Tyrannosaurus Rex boyfriend? An herbivore dinosaur, maybe, but a T-Rex, come on now that's just silly, he’d devour her.
Dr. Bumper: Nancy, who cares if they’re made up? All that’s important is that they make us realize no matter how bad things are, it could be worse. For example, last week, my mom walked into my basement room and caught me re-enacting Britney Spears’ “Baby One More Time” video while simultaneously crying because the DVR didn’t record the Battlestar Galactica series finale. What did I do? I hopped on FML and immediately my self-loathing was replaced with girlie giggles. Incidentally though I was still wearing my Britney skirt, and my mom was still in the room; but FML fixed that embarrassment up in jiffy!
Nancy: I’m sorry; I just can’t take anything on there seriously, especially now that I know you wrote at least half of them.
Dr. Bumper: Oh Nancy, you're such a joker. Seriously though, if you don’t find FML comical, as a doctor, I ought to see if you still have a funny bone!
Interviewer: Aren’t you a podiatrist?
Dr. Bumper: Thanks man, way to call me out on that one. Not cool. I’m posting this FML.
Interviewer: Some psychologists have criticized the site, saying it can be bad for people to constantly describe themselves in such a negative light. Others questioned the morality of making money off people’s sadness like this. Any response?
Nancy: I’m gonna take this one rather than let the podiatrist have a crack at it, the Doctor is clearly not right in the head. I suppose when all is said and done, it’s a generally harmless site, especially seeing as many are probably made up. Plus the rest seem to be in good humor. As per making money off people’s sorrow, if that was against the law, Death Cab for Cutie would have been behind bars years ago.
Interviewer: So do you think FML is just a passing fad, or is it here to stay?
Dr. Bumper: In my professional opinion, it will probably go the way of the Dodo bird, in that 17th century explorers will expose it to invasive predators and it will eventually go extinct.
Nancy/ Interviewer: *exchange confused looks*
Interviewer: On that note, this concludes our interview. Now if you really are having a bad day, I suggest you check out Fmylife.com (as it is funny) or watch this video, which always brightens my day (though it's painful to watch, I read he went on to actually work as a sportscaster):
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