95 Theses: Yale 1, Duke 0

As much as we like to consider ourselves a Southern Ivy, call the Gothic wasteland "the Harvard of the South" (suck on that Vanderbilt) and refer to Columbia as "the Duke of the North," Duke will never hold a candle to the Northeast's elite. We might beat them in basketball, but they yield more CEOs.

We at Duke thought we could rally around the brilliance of Duke University Improv's "My New Haircut (Asian Edition)." A response to another viral sensation, DUI's video become a hit. Duke students had made their name in YouTube history. But Yale had to best us. Not only is their "95 Theses" better produced and written than the DUI short, it is founded in academia. But if we can just accept that Duke will never be as good as the Ivy League, we can at least enjoy their superior intellect.