A night out... in Section

REMEMBER THIS? THE DOORS of the C-1 open and expel you and 100 of your closest friends onto the pavement of the West Campus bus stop. You're clutching your cell phone and the flyer some party animal slipped under your door. "We're going to Edens," you announce. Silence. Nobody moves. Finally, timidly, someone asks, "What's Edens?"

We've all been there. And for one weekend this fall, I returned to my roots and spent a weekend out as only a freshman can. Here's how it went down:

THURSDAY

Party: Wayne Manor's Malt Liquor Thursday (MLT)

Impressions: These boys take the minimalist approach to party-throwing. The walls are bare and the party monitors are only there to keep the hallways unobstructed to the cases of Busch Light. It's almost charming...in its own way.

Spotted: A boy in a navy blue polo shirt and cut-off jean shorts ('jorts') in the first floor hallway. His friend was standing

near me at the time and I saw his pupils dilate as his eyes turned wide.

"Hey man," he said admiringly, "are

those jean shorts?"

"Yeah," said his friend. "These are jorts."

FRIDAY

Parties: DEKE 'Hurricane Hanna' Party, Maxwell House School for Girls, SigEp Saloon

Impressions: They all had different themes, but it was essentially the same party carried out simultaneously in three different quads. I think they all used the same shopping list. Epilepsy-inducing strobe lights? Check. Pong tables? Check. "Fruit punch" so the ladies don't have to shotgun beers? Check. Who says chivalry is dead?

Spotted: A pack of freshmen on a futon in SigEp section having a loud, emphatic conversation about their college essays. One boy hoisted his solo cup into the air and proclaimed, "mine was about how I don't think I can be summed up in one essay!" Profound.

SATURDAY

Party: Tailgate

Impressions: Trying to explain tailgate to someone who hasn't been is like explaining color to a blind man. It just doesn't make any sense.

Spotted: Bagged wine, boxed wine, bottled wine, wine in trashcan-coolers, wine puddles, wine vomit, projectile wine in my hair. And a man in a cow suit.

-reported by Ryan Brown

-photograph by Courtney Douglas

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