The trendy way to do Myrtle

We all know it as the sketchy post-finals beach spot where Duke students party away their stress. The campus moves down to South Cackalacky for a few well deserved days of sun, sand and alcohol before graduation or summer jobs tear you away from the Gothic Wonderland.

Some misguided students expect a glamorous resort vacation lounging in paradise with frozen daiquiris and end up sorely disappointed in the shabby motels and so-so surf. The only way to do Myrtle Beach right is to embrace the dirtiness and the debauchery, reveling in the bittersweet life of a college student-so take careful note of the trends that epitomize this trash heap we know as college paradise.

Boho Chic Fashion

Perfecting the laid-back beach prep look can be hard for those who don't typically vacay in the Hamptons, but boho chic is an ideal look that goes anywhere at Myrtle. Pull a tiered hippie skirt over your bikini and you're set for lunch or shopping. If you're looking to keep the sun off your lobster-red burn, a light-colored tunic and wide-brimmed hat can take you from beach to barbeque in oh-so-Sienna fashion.

For perfect beach fashion you can either check out Barefoot Landing, which offers somewhere to go on the inevitable day of rain, or hit up the nearest Wings for tacky but fun beach accessories-sunglasses, flip-flops and goofy T-shirts.

Seedy Motels

You're going to sleep on the beach all day anyway, so where you stay at Myrtle should really be about location, location, location. The closer you are to the beach the less you have to stumble over empty beer cans on your way to the sandy shore once the sun rises. Furthermore, the closer to the party spot you are, the more motivation you'll have to return to your own room at the end of the night. It is definitely less sketchy to fall asleep in your own roach-infested motel than in someone else's. On that note, the party spots you should definitely check out are Bahama Sands, the Red Tree Inn, the Best Western and Jamaica Ocean Edge. They're all on the main drive, so if all else fails just follow the noise.

Dancing in Cages

Shooters is just pre-season training. The cages at Spanish Galleon and Freaky Tiki surpass any clubbing experience here in Durham. Sure, it's the same Duke crowd-and the same Snapple bottles filled with Aristocrat-but inhibitions are down in the new hot spots. That wallflower who usually just watches the action-nursing a beer from the corner-suddenly realizes that he too can cut loose. Remember, everyone looks good under a strobe light, and once you step into the cage, you never know what hottie hook-up will follow. After all, it's Myrtle, and as the saying goes, "What happens in Myrtle stays in Myrtle"-unless, as junior Kenny Larry says, "someone else sees it."

Not getting arrested

Outside the Duke bubble it turns out that students actually are held accountable for state and city laws they break. And no, "But no one told me public urination was illegal!" won't save you. Since jail restricts beach time-not to mention makes you wear those awful orange jump suits!-here are some Myrtle laws to watch out for, courtesy of myrtlebeach.com:

-Open containers of beer, wine or liquor are prohibited in vehicles or any public place including streets, sidewalks and beach areas.

-Cruising is regulated by the Myrtle Beach Police Department between 3rd Avenue South and 21st Avenue North on Ocean Boulevard between the hours of 2 a.m. and 6 a.m. from March 1 to October 1.

-Swimwear is subject to city ordinances in Myrtle Beach, North Myrtle Beach and Surfside Beach. It is illegal for anyone to wear a thong bathing suit. Violators will be fined.

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