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Question: What is furry, well-groomed, laps custom-assembled beverages out of a sturdy plastic container, wears a rhinestone chain around its golden brown neck and speaks in barky one-liners?

No, it's not Rufus, this year's winning pooch at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. Rufus, a colored bull terrier of superior breeding, looks exactly like a superior show dog should: improbably built and physically abhorrent. He probably has a great personality.

The answer is, instead, 21-year-old Johnny Weir, that super-duper sexy male ice skater who was recently crowned-sorry, deemed-the prettiest little second-place finisher ever after the men's short program.

Weir's made a name for himself not just with his impeccable and evocative skating-though his technical strength makes him, to borrow a phrase from his own parlance, "the artiste."

Rather, his plush fur stoles, handy iced venti nonfat chai with honey and fondness for designer denim (True Religion, natch) suggest he's of a different ilk than say, fellow Olympian Grandma Luge.

Because until Olympic bling is slung around his Mystic-tanned neck, Weir'll sport his signature accessory: a ice-encrusted necklace with a big D charm. That's D as in Christina Aguilera's "Dirrrty," one of Weir's all-time faves.

As for the brains behind the beauty? Any number of Weir's comments are medal-worthy. We choose this as best in show: "I'm not Jesus. I'm not for everybody."

Amen. -Sarah Ball